Belonging to Longing (Shabbat Ki Teitzei)

The Hebrew month of Elul which we are in, is a time of spiritual preparation leading up to Rosh Hashanah. As we approach the new year we deepen our sense of intimacy with our deepest yearnings, with what is greater than us – what some call God, or the sacred.

The way I respond to the deepest yearnings in my life — more often than I’d like to admit — is to refresh the New York Times homepage, or eat chocolate. We distract ourselves so we don’t have to acknowledge how far we are from who we want to be. Judaism offers us another way to respond: teshuva – often translated “repentance” and which literally means “turning” or “transforming.”

Each year at this time, we do cheshbon hanefesh — take an accounting of how far we have strayed from our sacred longings. We add Psalm 27 to our prayers (we’ll sing it together later): echad sha’aliti: One thing have I sought from Adonai – how I long for it: / That I may live in the House of Adonai all the days of my life.” We are to change our lives so we can belong to our longings.

Since we and all those we love are created in the image of God, we practice this returning to the sacred by finding what is deepest in each other, and turning towards it with love. Our tradition tells us before we can do true teshuva — we must tend to our relationships with one another.

And those moments when we want to distract ourselves with chocolate or headlines, we should instead do something completely counterintuitive… Rather than indulging in the distraction, whatever it is, we are to stop. Take a breath. And notice what is missing from our lives, so we can respond to that longing.

After we see what is missing, we must change our lives. Nothing crazy, just take one step: offer praise for what is good, thank someone for being there for us, apologize for our wrongdoings, and make time for what we truly care about. 

During these weeks of reflection, I encourage you to try journaling, spending quiet time outside, making art, or just putting aside a few minutes at the beginning or end of each day for prayer, meditation, or reflection.

As you do, may you be blessed with the trust, the prophet Isaiah offers in this week’s haftarah:

For the mountains may move / And the hills be shaken, / But my…covenant of friendship will not be shaken – said God, who takes you back in love (v. 10).

As we put aside the noise of the world for a moment to tend to the deeper yearnings in our lives — may we find God patiently waiting for us ready to welcome us back home — to meaning, belonging, and wholeness.

Ken yehi ratzon. May it be so.