Approaching our Inner Pharoah (Shabbat Bo)
Our parasha is called Bo for its opening words: “Vayomer Hashem el Moshe, bo el paro / and God said to Moshe, come to Pharaoh” (Ex 10:1). Most translations render this “go” to Pharaoh, but the Hebrew clearly means “come”! When we are told to go, it directs us somewhere else; when we are told to come, it directs us right here. It’s easier to say Pharaoh exists out there – far from us! It’s much harder to come to Pharaoh.
Torah tells us to meet God we must first meet Pharaoh right here. Who is Pharaoh? He is essentially recognizable by his heart, repeatedly described as “hard”, or “heavy”. Biblical scholar Nechama Liebowitz notes, during the first 5 plagues, Pharaoh hardens his own heart. But after the sixth plague, Torah states “vayechazek et lev Paroh” (“And God hardened Pharaoh’s heart”). At first, Pharaoh sets his own course. But, with every plague, it becomes more difficult for him to change. His reactions become engrained in habit, until his heart closes completely.
Maybe we recognize this in ourselves. Can see Pharaoh’s hardened heart right here in our midst. I admit I have had my share of moments over the past almost two years of feeling numb, cynical, frustrated, powerless. With the anniversary of insurrection at the Capital, and this surge in COVID, we all feel fragile. In the face of such loss and turmoil, despite moments of joy and hope, our hearts are heavy with sadness, hard with outrage and fear.
When we don’t know what else to do, we turn to an ancient tradition called kvetching. And while our complaints at times offer us release, help us remember life isn’t supposed to be like this – at other times our complaints come from habit and, like Pharaoh, drive us to lord our power over others because we feel so powerless. This is the choice we must make as we bo el paro, come face-to-face with our internal Pharaoh.
Rabbi Shefa Gold interprets our text:
Come on in! I am waiting for you inside the heart of Pharaoh…. Through this heart of Pharaoh you must come if you are to know Me, if you are to find your freedom.
Rabbi Gold’s beautiful rendering opens the possibility, in coming face to face with Pharaoh, we might honor the function the numb, hard, part of us has served – namely protecting us from becoming overwhelmed by grief and powerlessness. Once we acknowledge it, thank it, even! for its service to us! we can begin to again feel the tender aliveness of God pulsing inside of us.
If we pause to notice our own hardness of heart we can regain our freedom, renew our connection with something higher, something deeper. May we be blessed with the courage to approach our inner Pharaoh with compassion, to journey into our own hard and heavy hearts, and reconnect there with the divine spark planted inside each of us, so we can shine it into a world so in need of our light.